Defense of fear and bigotry.

Congress decided to reflect

an honor of collective moral judgement

and to express

moral disapproval of homosexuality.

~House report on the Defense of Marriage Act: 1996

Today I find myself once again writing about a topic near and dear to my heart, equality. The supreme court heard arguments today relating to the constitutionality of the Defence of Marriage Act. An act that was passed in 1996 with two main focuses. The first being to define marriage as being between one man and one woman, and the second being to punish anyone who was different. This law is not only unconstitutional, but is most importantly immoral.

First I will look at the unconstitutional aspects of this law. The United States of America was founded on the principles of equality, it was written in the Declaration of Independence itself: "We hold these truths to be self evident, that all men are created equal. That they are endowed by their creator with unalienable rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness." These aren't just words on a page, they are an idea that was the backbone of America. We are all free, and we are all equal. A simple thought, a much harder goal. America hasn't always lived up to this creed, often we have struggled to bring this dream to light, but we fight on and overcome those who would see us fail. America went to war to decide the fate of slaves, women marched to gain the right to vote, African Americans gave their lives so that they could be seen as just equal, not separate but equal. Each step brought us closer to the true dream of America, one nation of equals, E Pluribus Unum. Our dream is closer than ever before, but we are not there yet.

We are not there so long as young men and women are forced to hide who they truly are out of fear of how they will be treated by others. We are not there so long as loving couples are denied the basic rights that so many of us take for granted. We are not there so long as words like "gay" and "fag" are used as insults or used to describe undesirable things. We are not there so long as people continue to defend fear and bigotry.

Fear and bigotry, strong words, but those are the only reasons I can find for the Defense of Marriage Act, and Prop 8. My best friend is gay, has been his entire life, he never chose it, never wanted it, hell he thought about suicide, all because he was afraid of being who he truly was. That breaks my heart, luckily for me he decided to stick around, decided that he would be open with who he was and damn the consequences. A few years ago he fell in love with a great guy, and they got "married" (I have to use quotes as Utah doesn't recognize love unless it comes in one shape and size) I also got lucky and found love to an amazing woman. Here is the crazy thing... Our marriages in no way effect each other. Surprising I know! My marriage is in no way weakened because of his, when my wife calls me her husband, the word is not diminished because my friend is also called that. If anything my marriage is stronger because of the friendship I have with them, because when I look at them, I don't see two "gay" men, I simply see two people deeply in love.

Love.

Love..

Love...

Maybe if we spend more time being with the people that we love, and less time worrying about who everyone else loves, maybe then we can take one step closer to the dream of equality. I know one day we will get there, I have faith, and while I wait I will enjoy spending time with my loved ones, whether they are straight, gay, lesbian, bi, or transgendered, and I will be happy, and at peace.