Over the Rainbow

Life is eternal, and love is immortal,
and death is only a horizon;
and a horizon is nothing save the limit of our sight.
~Rossiter Worthington Raymond

 

 

Today is a  sad day, or maybe it's a happy day or maybe it's both. Like so many things in life, it depends on which way you are looking and which truth you see. From where I stand it seems to be a day that is mixed with both happiness and sadness. I don't like these sort of days, they make me want to sit down and in my best Winnie the Pooh voice let out a heartfelt "Oh Bother". I don't like these sort of days but I am glad for them, glad because they make me take a step back and view the world from a different angle then the one I try and use so often. I try and fill my life up with happiness, laugh at the world, and relish in the small victories, but sometimes we need some sadness in our lives, it makes the good times that much better.

 

Today I unexpectedly lost someone important in my life, and my world is a little darker from her passing. I have grieved and cried, laughed and hugged, I think I have crammed in every emotion there is this morning. All that is left to do is say goodbye.

 

Farewell: a simple word that holds so much meaning, I didn't get a chance to say the farewell that I wanted to say to you, I don't know if anyone ever does, we always think we have more time than we actually do. I didn't get to hug you and tell you that I loved you, I didn't get to tell you that everything would be all right. I didn't get to tell you that I would look after those you were leaving behind, I didn't get a chance to tell you to give grandpa a hug from me. I didn't get to say those things to you before you passed beyond my sight, and that saddens me, but I am comforted in the knowledge that I didn't really need to say those things, because you already knew them. I did say goodbye to you, because goodbye is said by the living to the living. We say it every second of every day, we say it in our actions, and in our words, in our thoughts and in our dreams. I know in my heart you knew the love we have for you, and I know that you were not worried about those you were leaving behind because you knew that others would be there to comfort them. I know you didn't need me to tell you to give your husband a hug, I know in my heart and soul that the hug you two shared after four years apart encompassed more love than I can imagine.

 

I know you are in a better place, I know that you are happy, and that knowledge helps make the sadness in my heart a little less. I know you had to go, and I am grateful that I got to have you in my life for as long as I did. You will live on in my heart, and in the hearts of all those who loved you, every time we tell a story of you, or simply sit back and share a memory, you will walk with us again. You will live on in the teachings of love and kindness that you gave to so many people. You are gone but not gone. Here and there. Lost and found. I can not see you, but I know you are there. You are just somewhere over the rainbow, and while I can't go there yet, I know you will be waiting for me to join you one day.

 

Farewell LaPreal, but not Goodbye.

 

Love

 

Troy